So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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