Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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