If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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