So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
