I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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