8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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