her vagine was all disorganized.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
