Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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