remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
