well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Enjoy the penises
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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