omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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