Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize