The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
