Texts From Last Night

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.

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  (702): yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark. http://tfl.nu/ahfc
  Replies (12) Good night (2122) Bad night (583)
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  (806): View more from Texas

  he shaved USA in his pubs

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  (806): he shaved USA in his pubs http://tfl.nu/vbz3
  Replies (20) Good night (1828) Bad night (3108)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  "Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"

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  (210): "Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People" http://tfl.nu/6fy6
  Replies (23) Good night (3656) Bad night (707)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test

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  (318): Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test http://tfl.nu/zno9
  Replies (20) Good night (5480) Bad night (801)
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  (+26): View more from

  And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.

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  (+26): And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores. http://tfl.nu/l5oq
  Replies (29) Good night (4632) Bad night (613)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...

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  (240): He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow... http://tfl.nu/tod7
  Replies (74) Good night (1808) Bad night (12223)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.

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  (612): My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment. http://tfl.nu/bb74
  Replies (8) Good night (4502) Bad night (1412)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong

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  (330): he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong http://tfl.nu/36h0
  Replies (3) Good night (1001) Bad night (1754)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.

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  (574): Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things. http://tfl.nu/zj1a
  Replies (6) Good night (2946) Bad night (725)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?

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  (781): Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge? http://tfl.nu/a35e
  Replies (1) Good night (1497) Bad night (580)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass

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  (281): I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass http://tfl.nu/c4rp
  Replies (9) Good night (1280) Bad night (512)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.

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  (620): We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night. http://tfl.nu/jjc7
  Replies (8) Good night (1048) Bad night (587)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.

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  (502): Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie. http://tfl.nu/p8oo
  Replies (4) Good night (525) Bad night (297)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.

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  (816): It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older. http://tfl.nu/1vux
  Replies (9) Good night (319) Bad night (669)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?

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  (214): Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape? http://tfl.nu/49bo
  Replies (2) Good night (371) Bad night (92)

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