this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
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