I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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