Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
