No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
you had me at cake vodka
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
