Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
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threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
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You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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