We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
