my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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