i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
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