Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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