what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
