After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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