I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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