I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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