would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
ugly people sure do ruin things
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
