It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
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Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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