I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
