Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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