I think I am morally bankrupt
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila