You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
