Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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