i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
