do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
