oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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