You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
