So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
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How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
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The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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