You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
