I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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