eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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