PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
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