11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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