But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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