Duck Duck Cougar?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
