a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize