So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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