I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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