No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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