I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize